twentynine

somehow the years between when this photo was taken and now have elapsed and i need twenty-eight more candles on my cake in addition to the big one shown here. each year i like to take out the photo album and look back at the first two years of my life; from NICU incubator to my first summer on the lake to my first christmas at grandma and grandpa's and back around the sun in my second year for a trip to florida and to new york. the album runs out of room sometime during the summer following my first birthday. the photos keep going into more and more albums and you can watch the family grow up in the little house on the lake.

though i lack the actual memories to confirm it, this home seemed like a slice of heaven. the photos portray the house as cozy, full of people and toys, with a deck that faced the lake and a swingset below. there were some marigolds planted and maybe tomato plants, and there was a boat at the dock and waterskiing equipment in the boathouse. my earliest memories there serve as my earliest memories from anywhere and though we left it behind when i was eight i feel as if i've retained that home in part of my DNA.

in costa rica much of our transportation was by boat. we rode down a river to the pacific and then on to the lodge where we stayed. we rode out to an island for snorkeling. we rode to a national park and floated along side much more graceful dolphins. each time we were in the boat i thought about how much my family would love being on the boat with me, especially dad. while looking at my photos from the trip he especially liked the ones i took of the wake of the boat as we were zipping around the ocean. it is one of my favorite views; i found out it is one of his, as well.

so today i can't help but reflect back on twenty-nine years and watch the wake pan out across the water. i'm very lucky to have a close-knit family that has stuck together and become stronger over the nearly thirty years. i've had so many adventures and seen so many spectacular places that when i really think about it my heart becomes overwhelmed with all the sights and sounds. the low parts of the past have had their edges worn away over time and even parts of my life in the past two and a half years have grown hazy so i can more clearly focus on all the good.

all we can do is look backward; we lack the technology to tell the future. what i know for sure is one day will unfold into another and i hope to open my eyes each day to see what it holds. i don't need presents for this birthday, just being here is enough. well, i'll take some cake, too. being here with cake is even better.