doctor bike

yes, those are indeed my very own legs spinning my pedals around this afternoon. happy one month since surgery to me. less lung but more heart.

my mouth has been watering over this moment for a week or so now. exercise holds the same joy as eating for me right now. i feel like i need to eat, to gain weight in preparation for more treatments, and i love foods rich in taste and comforting to me. i have been able to indulge away since arriving home. but exercise has been limited and walking doesn't hold the same spot in my heart as running or biking. i have taken it easy, walked a lot of miles, and finally i decided i was ready for a fifteen minute ride this afternoon. it is a perfect way to commemorate that this time a month ago i was in a post-anesthesia stupor asking over and over to see my brother and whether i could please have more ice chips pleasseeeeeeee.

i promise to take it easy. no long runs or rides or overdoing it. nothing too streneous, i am saving energy and still recuperating.

but the endorphins go so far in aiding my mental state and gosh, you can't even imagine how happy i am right now. a year ago, i'd be miserable on a day like today, freezing cold in march, a stiff wind out of the north, seems like winter is lasting forever after barely arriving at all, i'm not going for a run, i'm not going to exercise, this is ridiculous. today, however, i find myself on cloud nine, feeling as though i just won a race, on top of the world. my body is rejoicing. i still have some function left in my lungs afterall. today is a good day. i love my bike. i love how the water tastes when i am thirsty. i love losing myself in my thoughts as i ride. i can begin to sort things out again, finally. all is right with the world save for a bit of cancer.